OK. Here’s the scoop. I could never complete a worthy discourse on “the truth about pain.” I set such lofty goals, ones far beyond my capacity. I would be sorry that I even started this topic except that it seems there is a purpose in it. Truth has purpose.

So I will finish my thoughts by suggesting some application to what I started. I said before, pain is personal and thus hidden. We can’t know what another person is feeling. Whether physical or emotional pain, if a loved one claims to feel pain then our response must be to show tenderness and sympathy. Let me give some personal examples of how I’ve failed, and then succeeded to show tenderness and sympathy for someone else’s pain.

When one is young and strong, we don’t notice some things that would be a discomfort to others. For instance, I was at one time unaware of drafts in a room. If an elderly person would complain about a draft I didn’t really consider that it was anything of much importance. “How much could a draft affect a person?”, I wondered. That was until I became intolerant to cold. You would be amazed at how much a draft can affect a person! For me, now, it is the difference of tolerating the environment and a severe episode with pain which renders me so stressed as to incapacitate me completely. In the “numbers”, it can mean the difference between a pain level of “2” and of “8”. For me, “2” is as good as it gets and “8” means “get me out of here now!” All because of a draft that I once didn’t even notice. So next time your grandmother complains, show some consideration. Offer to relocate to another place without a draft or to get her a sweater to put on.

Another area that I’ve fail in is when someone says that they’re afraid of something that I would say is “ridiculous.” I’d tell them, “There’s nothing to be afraid of.”,  “Just don’t think about it.”, and other such statements of “dis”. (dismissals)    How cold!  Just because I don’t have such fear doesn’t mean that they don’t feel it or that it isn’t something significant to them!

I hope that I have become more sensitive to other people’s pain. I hope that you will, too.